the lagniappe

Hey mass audience I'm here on my couch 9:05 eastern standard time watching the 25th Anniversary of the I'm too old for this shit, Video Music Awards. 

There was a short, look-everyone-Britney-Spears-isn't-all-dosed-up-on-whatever-she-was-last-year segment playing on her recent success with acting, which I'm pretty sure happens on that How I Met Your Mother show, but I've never seen it so can't be totally sure.

Brit was then accompanied to the stage during a LIVE escort from some important looking stagey chick with icky brown hair, also accompanying her was her 10+ year old hit Hit Me Baby One More Time.  Most likely the LIVEescort was to ensure she was slipped no illegal substances en route to delivering her 10 second rushed opening which went off without a hitch, cong-rats BS you're SO back!

Some crazy Thriller looking dance with light sabers just happened and Rhianna was rolled to sing the opening ballad and I don't mean it to sound like she's fat or something.

Currently, the second member of the Forgetting Sarah Marshall cast of the night is on stage talking US politics, and based on what he's saying there's a 70% chance he might rape one, two, or all of the Jonas Brothers back stage,  this is going to be a good one, I know right. 

It looks like MTV's doing it down big time for the anniversary.

There's a strong chance this is going to be live blogging the vma's post 1 of 1